There’s a lot to consider when it comes to leaving your home and moving into a retirement home or a long term care facility. Many people aren’t sure of what they need, what their options are, or how much it’s going to cost them.
We spoke with Amy Friesen, CEO and Founder of Tea and Toast Retirement Living Advisory, to learn more about retirement facilities, how to choose them, how to tell them apart, and what you need to think about when making this life-changing decision for you or someone you love. The full interview can be listened to in full on our podcast here, or you can read part one below as we explore the initial questions that we all start off with.
IP360°: Can you tell us a little bit more about what Tea and Toast is?
Amy: Tea and Toast grew out of my love of working in the retirement living industry and with seniors. After spending nine years in the industry, it was clear that there was a need for people to be able to navigate the whole industry. Not from a home perspective but more from a community perspective.
Instead of going to a specific home and learning about it, we take the time to learn what the family wants and needs first, and then we go to the homes to find the right spot for their situation. We want to make sure that the home selection is based on our client’s needs, and not necessarily because you found one home down the street that may or may not fit. Most of what we do is problem solving for our clients.
IP360°: What is the difference between a retirement home and a long term care home? Because obviously, we’re all hearing a lot more of these terms lately, but not necessarily understanding what the differences between the two are.
Amy: It’s one of the top questions we are asked by our clients. A retirement home is what I call a ‘cruise ship on land’. Not because it’s super expensive, the way that some people think but more because it’s geared towards socialization.
A long term care home is more like a hospital-type setting. While there are social aspects in place, its priorities are on the care options.
IP360°: Are those two types of facilities ever combined? For instance, if there was like a couple, one of the couple needs retirement, the other needs the type of support available in long term care. Are there facilities that offer both kinds?
Amy: Not that I’m aware of. There’s just over 600 long term care homes in Ontario. And I think there’s around the same number of retirement homes. They’re not combined because they’re two different systems. You’ll typically see the couples go into a retirement home because there’s usually no waiting list. We would just consider what types of care levels are needed and we would find a retirement home based on that.
If one of the spouses then goes to long term care, they go through the qualifying process to get on the waiting list, the waiting list can be up to eight or ten years depending on the facility. Once they go through that, their partner can be qualified for spousal reunification, but it takes quite a long time. Most of our couples stay in retirement living options as long as they can.
IP360°: In terms of the retirement home, if you did need additional support for your care, what does that look like?
Amy: The retirement homes were where I am in Ottawa range from super independent all the way up to extensive care. You can get pretty much any type of care in retirement homes. It is always dependent on budget. If you have the budget to do so, you could happily stay in a retirement home until the end of days and get all the care you need. You could also supplement it with personal care if you wanted to as well.
IP360°: Can you elaborate a bit on the pricing differences in terms of when people are looking at retirement homes and long term care homes?
Amy: For long term care, the pricing is set by the Ministry of Long Term Care and it goes up annually. Long term care pricing is typically between $1800 to about $3000 per month depending on if you’re in a shared suite or a private. This includes all the care needed, including all of their hygiene products for example incontinence supplies and other similar products.
In the retirement home system, depending on what suite style you have, you could start somewhere around $2500 per month with no care. This would increase based on the level of care needed. To receive the top level of care, you could be adding another $2,000 per month to your suite costs.
The main influences on the price are typically how big the suite is, how many people are living in the suite, how much care you need, and how much care you need for the second occupant.
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IP360°: There is a perception that going into a retirement home or a long term care facility is an undesirable choice. However, it seems as though there would be benefits for someone who thrives off of structure, support, and activities. Have you found that residents change their perception after spending time in a retirement home or long term care facility?
Amy: We see so many people that kick and scream and don’t want to go. We work with so many people that don’t want to move. Those people tend to move eventually, and usually they say it’s one of the best decisions they’ve made and they wish they would have done it. I think the negative perception is born out of fear.
The seniors that are moving now, the kids are all for it because they see what a modern retirement home is. But their parents are from a different generation where they saved all their money, and they saw their parents and grandparents going into the nursing home long term care system. These old-fashioned and out-dated facilities have essentially haunted. And so they just equated everything to it, and they don’t want to go. So it’s tricky. You have to maneuver around it, but most of them feel like it’s been a really good decision.
IP360°: How does one begin to research and look at options for their parents if they are hesitant to look themselves?
Amy: The first step is to have the conversation with the whole family, including siblings or other family that’s involved. I think is a good way to start is make sure that all the siblings are the same page as each other, so that you’re not going to your parents with this vague idea. You want to come to an agreement and a united front, and at least if it’s somewhat united, and you can maybe get the conversation rolling with your parents.
But don’t spring in on your parents and say, “Oh, we’re doing this,” when they’re not prepared. Tell them you’re going to come over to talk about this, because you’re concerned. Let them know what’s going on, why you’re concerned, and what’s happening.
Otherwise, you can always work with an advisor to help you narrow it down. If you’re going to do the research on your own, start on the Retirement Homes Regulatory Authority website because they have all the retirement homes on there. I’m a big proponent of really trying to set out a plan, and then work from that plan, and then hopefully everything will start falling into place.
Amy Friesen is the founder and CEO of Tea and Toast. These excerpts are from our podcast interview with her that can be found in full here. Stay tuned for more tips on retirement planning and housing options from Amy coming soon.
